Thursday, October 8, 2009

e-Confessions

Some things just need to be said. Others don't. But unfortunately, my off-button malfunctions frequently. Its a problem I have had since childhood. Anyway, what is it about having a blog that drives me to confess really stupid things that I would typically be super embarrassed about confessing? Is it because sometimes when I confess my nerdiness I find that my friends out there validate me by sharing similar tendencies? Or is it because I have seen other people confess things on their blogs and I feel somehow compelled to do the same? I really don't know. But I have a couple more e-confessions for today. (I just made e-confessions up. I'm not sure whether it works or not).

* Sometimes I type up entire blog posts confessing really lame/silly/embarassing stuff and then delete the entire thing before posting.

* Sometimes I read other people's e-confessions and feel embarassed for them and think that they should have deleted the entire thing before posting. Then I wonder how often people think that about me. I am wondering that right now with this post.

* Sometimes I laugh at my own blog posts and then look around to see if Paul was in the room watching.

* Sometimes I read blogs of people that I don't know in any way. Like I will be on your blog and notice that you have a link to somebody else's blog (your 2nd cousin) and click through and then notice that your 2nd cousin has a link to somebody else's blog, and so on and so on. Sometimes I even decide to "follow" these random blogs if they are particularly interesting. And then when Paul walks in the room and asks what I am doing I get really embarrassed and close the web page really fast and say innocently "nothing." Like it was porn or something. But really I am just fascinated with other people's lives and thoughts. I think it may be an illness.

* Sometimes I am freaked out that blogs have "followers". Especially blogs with hundreds of "followers". But sometimes I check to see if I have any new "followers" and it kinda' makes me feel good that someone likes me enough or thinks my blog is interesting enough to "follow" in the first place and I wish that I had more "followers".

* Sometimes I read blog posts of people I respect and admire and love - people who I wish I were more like because they are so awesome - and they rage against things that I love - like ruffly aprons and red kitchen-aids. And for a fraction of a second I feel bad/embarrassed. But then I realize that, 'ya know what, it is OK to like frilly aprons and candy-colored appliances, and I am not ashamed, and that wasn't even what my friend was really blogging/raging about in the first place. And then I realize what it means to be easily offended and that I am a prideful sack and that I completely agree with my friend's post but in a different way than I originally read it. And then I am so grateful for the aforementioned friend for posting something that caused me to have a philosophical moment in my day. Because down deep (or deep down - is either more correct than the other?), those moments of introspection are one of my most favorite things about blogging.

That's it. I've gotta stop myself now. I just read this to Paul and he just said noncomittally, "hmm, that's funny" but in a way that tells me that he thinks this is maybe one of the posts that I should delete rather than post. But I'm posting anyway.

3 comments:

  1. Bahaha!

    Oh, friend. I really wasn't raging against aprons or bright kitchen appliances or the people who like them, more just voicing a concern about what they represent as part of a larger phenomenon--which doesn't apply to you since you aren't a SAHM who always looks like she's going to a costume party. I like you. Move to the midwest, please.

    (Also, one perk to my pregna-rage is that you never have to wonder if I'm raging about you, because if I ever were to (which is very unlikely), my tact level is quite low right now so I'd just say something like "So my friend Amy does this...")

    Anyway, I like your blog and would "follow" it, if I weren't opposed to promoting the "followers" widget on principle for precisely the reasons you state. It weirds me out.

    In other news, there is no shame in reading strangers' blogs! It's the internet, and if people blogged it, they want you to read it. Embrace that, and blog-surf with pride!

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  2. Nice post. I have three specific comments.

    I think your tongue-in-cheek observations about your husbands tongue-in-cheek observations about you are what I find most entertaining about your blog.

    You just took most people's dream vacation, so of course some people are going to follow your blog about it. (Incidentally, to turn the tables on random, or not so random blog visitors, do you use statcounter.com? I do.)

    Finally, all those pictures from your recent amazing vacation make your blog take forever to load.

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  3. I have a confession too...I totally relate to your fourth(I think it was fourth) bulletin point. I have this annoying habit of blog-hopping, which is how I discovered your blog. So since you don't know me I'll introduce myself:

    I'm Erika, a SAHM, live in Arizona, and think your blog is awesome. I enjoy your writing, love hearing about your schooling experience as I am missing mine and wish I could tag along in your suitcase for all your traveling adventures.

    ReplyDelete

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